What it really means when the Bible is non-negotiable

Yesterday there was a lot of talk going around about how the SCOTUS just changed the country forever. There were lots of Christians talking about how the Bible is a non-negotiable thing. We can't compromise on what the Bible says, on what God says. People keep saying this, and while I can say I agree, I also have to respond with " You keep using that word [phrase]. I do not think it means what you think it means." (Inigo Montoya, The Princess Bride)

You see, I respect the Bible, and hold it in far higher regard than I do your opinion on what it says. And I know you think that you know exactly what it means and what it is trying to tell us. But quite frankly, that certainty tells me you have likely put God into your constructed box and ask him to play nicely with your beliefs. And this is far bigger than just the current hot topic of homosexuality, it's about everything you think God to be like.  Your certainty shows me that you either don't understand the limits of your own mind or don't appreciate just how incomprehensible God is. You are not open to wondering if maybe the Church has gotten it wrong, for a very long time. That maybe we misunderstood what God has asked of us, or how he asked it, because he asked a few millenniums ago in a culture extremely different from the one we find ourselves in. The bible is not as black and white as you think it is. Figuring out how to live this life in a way that truly glorifies God is a lifelong quest, and not a behavioral checklist. 

Stop and wonder at the God who is outside of time.

Surrender to him all that you think you know about him and what he says. 

See what happens. 

Make space for him to change you. Again and again. Everyday. 

Hot Water vs. Water Pressure...

or "Where I am Still Very Aware of My First-World Problems"

Okay guys, I'm here to tell you about some of the small peculiarities I have. You see, I have this thing about water pressure. I absolutely love showers that have good water pressure. I notice this in every place I take a shower. Just ask my roommate (who's not really my roommate anymore, but will always have that title), Emily.

But what do you do when you have to choose between having hot water or having good water pressure? Because, showers don't always feel like showers when they are cold, am I right? But lack of water pressure means you never really feel like all of the shampoo is out of your hair. I think of Emily everytime I take a shower, well, because for her, hot water is about as important to her as water pressure is for me.

So, let me explain why this happens. You see, people don't have hot water heaters here, like no one, except for maybe the super rich people. Even the middle class people don't have them. So, how then would you ever take a hot shower? So, they invented this electric shower heads, which heat the water right before it comes out of the shower head. In order to have better water pressure, you have to push the water through that shower head a lot faster, but this means that it goes through whatever water heating process to quickly, and thus does not get very hot.

It creates quite a dilemma for me, wanting both hot water and good water pressure. But I probably shouldn't complain, as there are far worse circumstances to be in. But I don't think I will ever stop wishing for both at the same time.

So, which would you choose, hot water or good water pressure?

On being an introvert and wanting deep relationships

Okay guys, it's another post that was an online discussion post for my class where we talk about culture learning. What can I say, this teacher asks questions that really make me think and then articulate well. Enjoy! 

Let me tell you a little story. So the other day, Josh and I went to our Site Coordinator's house, just for a little rest and to hang out with him and his wife. They teach a free community English class on Saturdays and were telling us about one of the boys in the class. They kept commenting on how strange he was, though they seemed to like him a good deal. Apparently, what made him strange was that he like to spend time at his house instead of going out with his friends everyday. And one day, when his mother forced him to go outside. He walked up the hill their house is on, and stayed at the top, watching the clouds and reading the newspaper. They were in awe at how strange he was. And all I could think about was that those two things sounded absolutely lovely and I wanted to do them. You see, this boy is an introvert. And this story is a perfect example of how Brazilian culture has absolutely no idea what to do with introverts, except to call them strange. So, in my attempts to learn this culture, to fully embrace it, I am faced with the fact that I will forever be considered strange and out of place because I often prefer to spend time by myself. 

The double whammy to this is that, though Brazilians are highly relational, most relationships remain at a fairly shallow level, at least how I evaluate relationships. Deep friendships outside of your family seem to be very uncommon. This makes things even more difficult because I can't stand shallow relationships. I honestly don't know how to function in them.  So, the way I view my new friendships is very different from the way my Brazilian friends see them. They feel like we are great friends, and I feel like I barely know them. It's a difficult path to navigate, wanting to be equally as excited and committed to a friendship, but also wanting to be honest in how I am engaging people. 

According to this article about culture stress, these issues are the causes listed as Temperament and Values, definitely. It manifested in basically all the ways listed under results, except for illness, fear of germs, and distrust of food (but don't worry, Josh covered those, so Team Brazil's got them all covered) :). I was tired and didn't want to get out of bed. I felt helpless. I wanted to move back home. I felt like a failure. I got mad at the culture for not having a way to understand me. 

But, don't worry guys, I'm definitely on the way out of all of this. I still have my moments (okay maybe whole days sometimes) but I don't think they are supposed to go away completely. This article says this process can take up to five years. So, ya, I'm totally normal. Some of the ways I've started to deal with it is with a Gratitude Journal, helping me focus on the things that I love and value in this culture and in this experience and place. Also, Josh and I have made a schedule with goals (because I need to have some sense of accomplishment, yay American values) that have been super helpful in motivating me on a daily basis. Also, we've started to actually schedule in real breaks in our life on a weekly and monthly basis. Which, though we've only gone twice, has been super helpful and gone a long way in making me feel like me. 

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The one idea from this article that I am kind of struggling with from this article is the idea of Identity. 

• Identity. Know who you are and what you will allow to be changed about you. Acculturation inherently involves changes in your personality, so determine the unchangeables.

I've always been a big fan of knowing you are and walking confidently in that. But in re-listening to a lot of my favorite worship songs and re-reading of some scripture, I've started to question this idea of "unchangeable". If I am dying to myself daily, as Luke 9:23 calls us to do, if I'm being transformed by the renewing of mind, as Romans 12:1-2 instructs us to do, and if we are clay in the potter's hands, as Jeremiah 18:6 reminds us we are, does he not have the right to remake and reform us? Does he not have the ability, and every right, to ask me to change things that I consider part my "unchangeable" identity? I think it will be (and has been) insanely difficult and challenging, but I think it is a part of becoming all things to all people. 

I also think we over-use the idea of being "healthy". Not that it's not valid, but I think maybe we use it as a crutch or an excuse not to change in ways God is asking us to, or to not even consider that God would ever ask us to change in this way. I don't know. I don't have any final thoughts or conclusions on this yet, but I'm pondering these things because I feel like characteristics I've considered to be "unchangeable" about me for a very long time are things God is asking me to change. Your experience confronting what you've held to be true and real will cause you to ponder a bit. 

thoughts on culture and transformation

Below is something I wrote for a forum post for school. We were talking about culture and learning and transformation. These are thoughts at the root of so many of the other things going through my mind. 

"Every culture is imperfect and, in fact, a prison that holds people in bondage, each one is at the same time the integrating point of reference by which people comprehend themselves and others.  We must understand that transforming a society does not mean moving people from their prison into ours but rather helping them to know Christ and be transformed personally and communally into people and communities of the Spirit" (Lingenfelter, Ministering Cross Culturally: 120)

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When I stop to reflect on this two things stand out. The first is that the goal is transformation. The second, that the means is knowing Christ. When I stop to think about my own transformation and how I long to see culture transformed I recognize that these things started when I, after spending 19 years (my whole life at that point) in the church, actually read the bible to see what it said it about God. Up until that point, I had just believed everything other people had told me. While it wasn't wrong (well, at least not all of it), it wasn't the kind of knowledge that brought about transformation of heart, mind, soul, and life. Now, I was actually looking to see what it said, not just to affirm or prove all the things I already thought.

 

My fear is that there are countless people who think they have been transformed in the way this quote speaks of, but, in fact have not. They have never stopped to notice how their own culture does not agree with the way God would have his followers live. How then do you help people who think they are entirely transformed actually be transformed? Even when you live with them, they still see what you are doing as a "special calling" which allows them to stay just the way they are thinking they have been transformed in this way.

 

I say this from experience. I, for many years, thought I was transformed, in the way this quote uses the word. But I wasn't. And the only way it happened to me was through making bad choices and realizing they were just as empty as the subculture I came from. But maybe that there is the key, to recognize that even the supposedly transformed subcultures are still, in fact, prisons.

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I took a class in undergrad that taught me something I’ve never forgotten. It was in regards to the Wisdom Literature of the bible. My professor taught us that these books were meant to expose the reader to the darkness of their own soul, the places where they fell short and needed to improve. For many of you, that might seem obvious. But up until that time, whenever I read these books, I always left feeling as though I had everything under control; they confirmed just how wise and wonderful I was.

 

I read this quote with that same caution. Because, no matter how hard I try, there are still ways in which my own culture, or subculture, is a prison to me, in ways that I can’t even see. In what ways have I not been transformed? How does that affect the way that I help others know Christ, as this author encourages his readers to do? 

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(And now some new thoughts) 

This is the trap that I found myself in, I think one of the ways that I ended up so low in recent weeks. Most missionaries get accused of trying to impose their home culture on to the one they are entering. I was keenly trying to avoid this downfall. So much so, that I ended up trying to put myself into another prison. A prison that didn't allow me to thrive, because it still is not the culture God sent his son to give us. I cannot exchange one prison for another and expect that to be the solution to be relevant in a culture that is not my own.

growing pains and changes

Sorry I kind of went MIA there for a while guys. It's been a busy month and a really rough month emotionally. I've been told by those who have done this before that this stage is normal. You get to the point where you've learned enough about the culture not to like it, and you likely haven't developed the kinds of relationships that make it worth it. So you get bitter. And you don't know what do with yourself. And you feel like a failure for feeling that way. And should missionaries always be filled with love and joy and God's light? Nope. We're still human too. Which means we have crappy days where we don't feel like getting out of bed in the mornings. Struggle with me as we go, will you?

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I think this blog will mostly take a different shape soon. Instead of thoughtful posts, with ideas that have been all fleshed out, I'll likely be asking more questions. Putting forth thoughts that are brought to mind by the world around me. Some of them may not be things you agree with. Some of them might make you uncomfortable.

But what I'm learning, now more than ever, is that SO MANY of our conceptions about God really aren't accurate. We've made God in our image. So this is me trying to give him back his immense-ness, his incomprehensible-ness by saying that I don't know and what if this other way that we've completely missed is actually the way it is. Instead of immediately reacting to the ways I may offend all the things you've always held as true, stop to really consider it. Stop long enough to realize that maybe we've understood God completely wrong. It's not that God is wrong, just that we've missed the point in understanding the messages he left for us throughout history.